This global pandemic has held the world hostage for the past 6 months, and things are not the same — things will never be the same.
Throughout this overextended quarantine, I have gone through a spectrum of emotions and it has drained me, affecting every aspect of my life. During this time, I’ve also begun to identify what really works for me and how to help myself make sense of all of this.
*Disclaimer: I’m not a psychologist, but I’m a mental health advocate and have been going through depression, anxiety, and panic attacks. I’m still navigating through life. What you’re about to read may not be for you, but it works for me and I hope it helps you somehow.
SURRENDER
Surrendering to your emotions is not easy. However, I learned that when I push my emotions aside because I need to finish my duties, I explode later on. I also can’t properly finish my tasks to the best of my ability because I have something in the back of my head.
Surrendering hurts, you feel everything a bit more. The excuse you tell yourself is that you have “no time” to emote, but you should not deny yourself a moment to feel. Don’t push away your emotions. Let them come, let them surface, and allow yourself to feel.
If you have a trusted friend, talk to them. Tell that person that you’re venting and not asking for advice. If you need your own space to feel, give yourself that. Since we’re all at home now, and you feel your place is too crowded, take a few extra minutes separate from everyone to express yourself — that may be in the shower, in your room, or even in the car.
Your feelings are valid. Don’t allow anyone to tell you otherwise.
BREATHE
While your feelings are valid, acknowledge that your emotions are what you feel right now. When we are so into what we are feeling, we feel like the world is closing in on us so we tend to make irrational decisions that we regret later on. Breathe. Surrender to the emotion and remind yourself that it is not the end.
You can try something I do when I’m in the thick of things. I sit up and shut my eyes, then I take 10 deep breaths and focus solely on the sound of my breathing. Whenever my mind wanders, my count goes back to 1. I repeat that until I reach 10. Once I’m done, I recognize what I’m feeling, why I feel that way, and what I can do to give myself peace.
This takes time, especially when everything feels so intense, but again, you must allow yourself some space to breathe and process things. It also helps to have someone you trust to help you through it. Someone to remind you to take deep breaths when all you’re doing is panting and gasping for air. It’s easy to shut down and choose to be “numb” — trust me, I know. However, I found that simply breathing deeply helps so much in clearing the mind.
TAKE STEPS
Again, it’s so easy to shut down and “move on” because life goes on. Remember, despite our circumstances, things will always lookup. Once you realize this, things will feel lighter. You will not allow your emotions to eat you up.
Create manageable goals to get back into yourself again. Manageable goals could be as simple as getting up 10 mins earlier or spending less time on social media. Only you could set goals that are achievable by you.
Maybe tell someone about these goals so that you have a sense of accountability. However, don’t pressure yourself to get into it all at once. I know it’s tough cause life moves fast and deadlines don’t wait for anyone, but forcing yourself to rush into things will only implode again later on.
So how? How to do all of this with work/school piling up? Give yourself mini “me time” breaks. During this time, allow yourself to do what you have to do in order to free yourself from emotional stress. You don’t need to surrender to all your emotions in one go. Let yourself feel, acknowledge, and realize in small batches. It makes all the difference.
Life will happen, and it will keep happening. Sometimes, life is too much and we should acknowledge that. We are human. We don’t have super *emotional* strength to get through everything with ease. We’re in this together. So when you feel the world collapsing on you and the black hole is sucking you in, remember that you are not alone — even when you feel you are. Talking to someone helps tremendously in letting go of the emotions you bottle up inside.
Remember to always make time for yourself. You’re at your best when you take care of yourself.
Allow yourself to surrender, breathe, and take steps to help make sense of it all.
